And we say goodbye to 2004

You know it is always funny to me, to look back at something that you thought would kill you and doesn't... how you can't sleep at night because you think that those bills would never get paid, your car couldn't never be replaced and your heart could never be mended, or the heart of a loved one... but then you look back at how time truely does heal you, when you just got the f#ck out its way and let it do what it does best...

The first three months of the year: Jan, Feb, March:
So I start the year with no job... because the one I had right before the end of the year sucked. I worked for a credit card company trying to ring money from rocks... and there is no water coming let alone money! So I quit. And then I was without for about 3 weeks... no money coming in, and lots going out... so I got a job waving at cars... yes, you read that right, I was waving at cars, in an Uncle Sam outfit, in the freezing Mid-western winter, for money, and not good money mind you, just enough to pay my bills... and I almost froze on more than one day.

But this gig only went on till tax day in April! In the Meantime, I got a job working at Mark Industries in Elgin, IL driving a truck full of glass... which was a really fun job other than the fact that I had to get up at the back-crack of dawn (even the sun would not awake for the first hour or two that I was working) The guys there were really nice to me and they were really understadning about my interests in acting that I was doing that on the side. I was also working for a promo company that my buddy Chris hooked me up with. This was a busy time of the year for them and I was in the city working all the time... good times!

Hanging with my friends was nice and things with Lisa were going good, life seemed like it was starting to work it self back into a balance.

The next three months: April, May and June

This is where things go from super great to not-so super great... For my birthday, I had the most wonderful party that I have ever had. Lisa, with the help of my friends from home, gave me a suprise bash at Gameworks, which is an arcade where I can drink... so video games, gifts, cake and white russians... good stuff!

There was Beyond Thearpy, which was my first chance to be back acting, the first time in almost a year to the day. This was my first chance to work with Bree as an actor, though I had seen her in a few different shows, all of which I had loved. And I got to be working close with Neil again, who has always been one of my favorite actors to work with. This was such a great time and I thought that the show was SO funny and SO fun! Bree and Neil were the best that I feel I had seen them up to that point and friends who had not gotten to see many of my shows in college got to see me act again, which was really nice.

As we moved into the next month something great and something crappy happened - The great thing was that I got cast in Macbeth with Talisman Theatre, as Macbeth (which was one of the most fun roles I have ever played) yet the crappy thing was that my Honda, which I had planned to take with me to LA - died. So I had to go and get a new car - or rather a "new to me" car which was the white piece of crap that I drive now... but it has a CD player and runs well and I love it for that... and it was cheap which is also nice.

June was the month that changed everything. They say that nothing ever stays the same and that life keeps changing as it goes along and you're either in or your out. Now looking back at the wrongs I brought down on the relationship I was in with Lisa and the way I acted at Kerri's wedding, one would say that I was out... and it wasn't long after that Lisa wanted out too... which has turned out well for the both of us. I know that she wasn't as happy with me as someone else could make her, and there is nothing that I want for her more, seeing as she is a great and still close friend of mine, then for her to be 100% happy and I know that she would want the same. Yet we went through a few hard months.

...and Macbeth rolled on...

Then came more: July, Aug, Sept

July marked the true end of Lisa and I and started my moving on in the world. Macbeth was beginning to take some real shape and Micheal called about having me work on a new movie, which is was set to audition for. I started going out and drinking and dancing with Angie, Nick, LFG, Danny and Bree... there were random others, but this was the main gang. Bree and I started to spend alot of time hanging out together, with Nick or sometimes just us.

Macbeth opened and got some really nice reviews, and while we were working on it I was asked to understudy a role in The Tempest. All of my buddys came to see the show and they seemed to really love it, Bree one of the most. Adam came to visit and we took him to the Green Mill and Justin came into town for a few days to hang out on his way to LA. Both guys got to see the show and I loved getting to see them again!

About that time something in the relationship between Bree and I changed, which was a wonderful new feeling. We started to hang out more and more. It was cool, because I had never felt that "growing love" feeling before, how something wonderful becomes something else wonderful... it is hard to describe because it is just... I don't know... in you, if that makes any sense at all.

Bree and I started working on "Resurrection Mary" which was the movie that Michael had written and I thank my friend Mike Wollner for getting me in to read for Michael. Without that I wouldn't have gotten the role that I had and I wouldn't have had the wonderful experience that came from it. Both the Mike's are like wonderful, older brothers to me and have been great in helping me out and getting me rolling as far as my carrer and my "acting" life have been. Being with them on this one, a learned a ton. We did auditions, read-throughts and a bit of rehearsal... and then we were ready to get filming.

The Last Three: Oct, Nov, Dec

The last three months of 2004 were full of hard work, then no work with a pinch of almost depression and then satisfaction...

I was working full-time (50 hrs+) at Mark Industries still, filming all night long and then heading back to work the next day... all the while still trying to hit the gym everyday and eat well and find time to spend with Bree off the set and with my friends... some of that was not possible, as I really saw no one during the filming except those who were on the set and my work guys.

The movie was painful to work on some days because of the lack of sleep, but man did I have more fun working on that little movie than I think I had had in my life up to this point. And let me tell you, without Bree there is no way I would have made it through the movie at all. First of all, at the beginning of the month (and this really has nothing to do with the movie) Bree came to my aid when I split my finger open at work because of one of my co-workers carelessness. Then (and this does have to do with it) Bree was on-set all the time, helping me with changes, making sure I was dry and warm and taken care of, that I was getting sleep when there was time and driving when I had to go straight back to work that morning so I could sleep. She was and continues in my life to be a godsend.

But the movie kept moving on and we were having a blast - bloody heads in elevators, swimming in muck and flipping over cars was all part of the game, and it was a blast.

I got let go during the middle of film, which they said only had to do with the fact that it was slowing down for the winter and they really didn't have anything left for me to do anymore... which was fine because now I could get some sleep... but I was a bit depressed for a while until Bree and I had a great talk about it... I mean, I had never been let go from any type of job before, so that was a little hard to take.

But Nick and Dave came to my aid by giving me a bartending job, which Dave trained me how to make drinks and that started to go wonderful. And Bree hooked me up with the unemployment office to help me out till I got a job... and I did, at Circuit City.

As for Nov and Dec, well... that is all in here... finished the movie, moved in with Bree, hung with Nick, Scott, Kel, Steve, Dave and all the gang, worked a little, played video games a little, got into Sundance and started looking for someplace else to live.

I had my last day of work at Circuit City yesterday and that was fun - played video games with the boss on a 60" Sony all day and then got to have Dinner with the Fam and Drinks with Bree, Dave, Nick and Steve (even Scott and Kel came by for a bit)

Tonight I have to work, and today I have been packing and taking my room down... 12.5 days left... since this one is already half over.

I have so much fun packed into the next 12 days too - Lord of The Ring trilogy watching party, Hanging with Niel, lunch with Colleen, Jaeden and Maygen, Chicago plans with Bree (Spamalot!) and so much more... so little time it seems like... it went by so fast. Yet 2005 looks to be better than 2004, and that year was a damn good one.

Things coming up -
~ Sundance from the 13th of Jan to the 1st of Feb
~ Moving into LA and sleeping on Brian... whatever Brian has, till Bree gets out there
~ Looking for acting work
~ Waiting for my baby to come to LA
~ Also waiting to see "Resurrection Mary"
~ Hoping you guys will come out and see us soon and often!


Like Nick always says "It's good to be Jason" and looking back at my year and toward the ones to come... I would have to say yes, it's good to be me.

Love you all and have a safe and happy New Year!

See you on the other side with 2005!
J.

Two Days till the end of 2004

I have one more day of work at Ciruit City and then one more day of work at Haystacks and I am all done. I can hardly believe that I am going to moving half way across my known world in less than 20 days... in 14 days... wow.

It is hard to believe that I was ever at a place where LA was 300+ days away and now it is a matter of a few weeks. I cannot wait! Sundance is going to be so much fun - there are some wonderful movies that are playing this year. One is a doc about the Special Olympics called "Murderball" which is about wheelchair rugby, sounds really amazing and there is an Adrian Brody movie called "The Jacket" that I have dying to see ever since I heard Adrian talking about it.

Chirstmas this year was wonderful. I got to spend only a short time with the family on Christmas eve because of having to work at Haystacks, but that is okay, work was cool that night and I hope to get to see the fam again on another night soon before I leave, though I don't know when.

Christams with Bree was amazing, she loved her gifts and thought that they were the coolest. I loved my Sinatra book and all of my martini stuff! OH super cool!And the amount of new movie that I got this year hurts my head to just think about.

And Nick's parents gave me a wonderful gift - a contact with the producer of "Days of Our Lives" which I hope will turn into something when I get out to LA! I would wonderful to be working on a Soap! Real money for acting... who would have thought that I would be doing this for real... well, I did. =) But so soon... that I was never sure of, just thought that it would work out. So we shall see what comes of that and all of the wonderful contacts and options to come.

Two days till the years end and it has been something else.. what a year... but that is a look back I think I will do on friday... that would be fun. Much love and peace!

...And Scene
J.

22 days away

So the countdown is winding down here and I thought that I would check in and fill you in on what has been going down with me over the past week or so since last I was on.

Working alot at Ciruit City, which is an alright job for the moment, but it is really boring most of the time because there is really no one out shopping. It is super slow here and it is only days before Christmas! What is the deal with that you ask? Uh, this store kinda isn't that great... we are out of tons of stuff and I think that alot of people shop online now to avoid going out this time of year - I know that I did! It is cheaper for me and I don't have to wait in lines or anything... so why do it any other way?

Other than that, I have been working at Haystacks on the weekends, working my bartending skills and they are getting much better I must say. The only thing that I am not really good with still is the wine, but that is really hard, since I never really have any idea what we have in stock and what we don't (as far as Reserve Wine goes - the house wines I got down!)

I have been starting to pack and I am going to most of that on Jan 2nd and get everything ready for the move on that day. I am only going to bring my Computer, iPod, Xbox, DVD's and my Clothes. Anything else I am going to have to wait for... well, and some books. Most everything else is going to stay here until Bree comes out... which I hope is soon after.

I cannot wait until she and Nick (in Jan 2006... I am holding you to that one bro!) are out there with Brian and all of my TVI friends (Justin, Joel, Reggie and John) plus Boo! Brian! That is going to be the best - and then when Scott and Kel come out, which they have been talking about doing! Wow, LA is not going to know what hit 'em!
So, the movie rap'd and we had a little party, which was nice. There were no hoes or cops showing up, so I don't know how really cool it was... kidding. It was nice to see some of the cast and Dr. P and his wife... Michael and his new house, which I helped him move into a week or two ago. It is a very nice place. I cannot wait to see the finished movie and hope that he has it done before I leave.

I am going to Sundance - and thus brings me to the "22 days away" because I have a leave-date: Jan 12th. It is going to take me something like 22 hours to get to Park City and I am going to drive straight through... and get there in one day. It is going to be a hard drive and the longest that I have done to date - I have driven 10 hours to Canada all at one time and it seemed like it was never going to end... but that was Canada... in a cramped van... but at least I was with loved ones and friends. This trip to Park City is me, driving alone. Which I think is going to be very good for me. To be alone and out on my own for this long, hard drive is going to be an important growing experience that I going to help get me ready to be in LA - more than I already am! (better pack alot of food and Mnt. Dew!)

I cannot wait to get out there and start working, start looking around and getting to know the town and starting my slow work to the top of the mountain. It is going to be quite a wonderful hike but I am ready for the challenge!

Have a Wonderful Christmas Holiday with your Family and Friends. Love ya all!
~ J